Birthday coming up

Next month I will be having a birthday. And while I'm happy to see another year, its also bittersweet. With a capital B. So much has happened over the last 5 years and while some things were okay, some were not. There was divorce, death, moving three times, and  starting over, there was also and meeting a new people including a new man  and trying new things.  Now I am adjusting to a new normal - which we all have had to do.  It just seems it was a lot to do at once with no time to breath.  Now I'm facing a birthday where my body is telling me I am not that young girl I used to be.  Where does one go to find her?

Now that places are starting to re open I will be making appointments again soon to try and reclaim what I have lost or misplaced. Did I mention I am going through Menopause as well? That makes it that much more fun. NOT its frustrating as heck. I have always been the caregiver, now I seem to be the one who needs caring for... Thats not easy to adjust to. But I am still trying.  Just thought I'd drop ya all a line, for those who are still reading these.

Two Months in

Well its been about 2 months sense they put us under self isolation with businesses closing wondering if and when they will  reopen.  It was and still is a time of uncertainty and wonder.  What have you been doing?  I wish I could say I did something of interest and importance, but I cant say that. I have always been an introvert and home body, but when you have no choice but to be a home body and CAN'T go anywhere because everything is closed. It makes for tough days. ..

So what did I do, same ol same ol. Stayed home read, tried to write, argue with hubby over what to watch that night, cook clean, watch tv and play games. Some of the shows I watch broadcasted from home and tried something new. Which is awesome.I learned some new recipes and rearranging how to's as well projects which I'm currently in the process of doing. 



I am also writing ghost stories based on YouTube videos  (and the owners of these videos know about) and trying to turning their adventures into stories. I have two specific series' in mind and am working to make them unique.  We will see how that goes. You can follow me on Facebook if you wish. My name there is Lea Rachel with a cat in front of a computer as the profile picture.

Now you may wonder why Connecting to the soul is writing ghost stories, but I believe what ever makes you happy and keeps you sane right now short of breaking the law.

Will keep you updated on how the stories are going....

Later~~~~

updating reading

Well with the quarantine of many places happening what a better time to read and or write, play games either video or board.  Or spend time with family if that has been hard to do with work or other family routines, which most likely have been cancelled. (Sorry for that). But what a great time for family gatherings or reading together. Sitting around reading out-loud taking turns reading a chapter of your book,  or silently together.  It's just my man and me so fortunately occupying kiddos isn't necessary. He plays video games of which I like watching and helping and I read or write. As of course we talk, but there are those days if we cant go places it drives us nuts.

We have been trying to build a personal library of every kind of book,,, he likes fantasy series books  ie wheel of time type books.... books of swords and wizardry … while I like romance, ghost and mystery. I have books by my favorite authors as he does and while I will read some of his, he wont read mine..... (doesn't do romance)  Our new library is a great  thing because since we live so far out and the book mobile is cancelled for the time being when we do go out we look at the free libraries that are around town and find a few books we like.

While I like rearranging he doesn't. So I can only do so much ( besides, he hurt his wrist last week and can't use it much right now any way) . But I do what I can.

Last Thursday and Friday- 19th and 20th I was dealing with side effects from a medication I was taking,,,,, sick as a ….well all get out as my grandmother would say. I'm going through menopause and trying to find meds that will balance everything out. But this is proving hard to do.  And I hate taking meds to begin with so have been trying to find CBT therapy options but with this virus going round seeing someone is hard to do, so I am trying different options I find online. I guess the side effects are reminding me I don't like taking meds. In fact, there has only been one medication that has helped and not screwed me up. So I believe I will be sticking to that alone.
     
If anyone knows of non med ideas I would love to hear them.

Anyway on a better note, I am reading two or three books and are half way threw them now they are ghost stories and one book has two different stories in a series called "Secrets in the Walls" which so far is pretty good. The other book is "Hidden in Dreams" One is an e-book the other print, so when I get tired of holding the print book, I switch up.

Any way what is every one else doing during these days of limited activities?  See ya soon. Stay well and safe.

Reading Marathon

 Hey  All!
      Remember me? Yea I'm the one who said I'd check in every Friday.  Then  changed that to what once a month, or every two weeks.  Any way, I am still here reading away. My hubby and I are building a library thanks to free libraries that are around town.  We do try and alternate books or give back when we find books we will absolutely NOT  read. So we have not only printed books, but I also have Kindle and Nook books as well. I just finished one just in  time for hubby to come home with two more books. I am hooked already on one. "Hidden in Dreams" By Davis Bunn. I am already on chapter three, and will again try and update you on how its going.

 How many of those who read these enjoy escaping into reading?  We love action adventure.... ghost mystery, and romance- well I'm the one who likes romance. but regardless we are seeing just how many we can read this year, trying to increase the count that we had last year.... ( and I don't remember that number but we already have ten between us.  The books are like 400 pages and we tend to read at night.

 Talk to ya all soon.

Part 1 Menopause Nightmare When Things Go Wrong

Well it's almost the end of the first month in a new year. And I had hoped for a better year, but as of right now it just seems to be the same the only thing that changed was the date. So many things have changed for me in the past  3-4 years. Some good  some bad. Some I'm not even sure whether they were both good and bad.

This year instead of resolutions I was going to choose a word and have my life circle that word, to make it a proactive instead or reactive. It was going to be intend. Or intention. Not sure which yet.  But instead it is turning out to be the word Angry, at everything and especially  my man.  And that was not my intention. I love him, but lately it seems everything he does or  says sets me off and I don't know why. I now I'm going through menopause and that could be it. And if it is I would like to get things resolved.

If anyone who reads this can relate let me know. I could use some advice. I will be seeing my doctor soon, but not soon enough.  Right now I feel alone.

As for reading and posting every Friday. Well I am still reading, but posting about what I have done will be scattered.  In fact, since I last posted I have changed books four or five different times... Much like my writing I read for or five books at once. Or change up when I get bored with the one I am currently reading.  So I have changed up. I read a chapter a book. That way I wonder stop reading it.

 How do you handle reading when the book gets boring to you:???

 Til Next Time.

Chapter 1 complete

The first chapter was 22 pages long, as of the writing of this I was only on page 14. 

As a rule depending on when I read and what else is on my plate sometimes the chapters seem to go on and on. I find myself wanting it to end. Not because I don’t like it, but because I want to get to a good stopping point.



Not sure if I can (legally) read the back cover for you but so far what I am getting is this story is about two brothers who reconnect with two young women who they have known all their lives and fall in love.  But its how they fall in love that captured my heart.



 It’s finally Friday and as of Wed Morning I finished chapter one. Although I had to reread a few pages to get back into the story, once I did, I didn’t want to stop. (have you ever felt that way?) Well, its Thanksgiving and the band the brothers Jack and Jimmy are apart of are back in their home town having dinner with one of the brother’s girlfriends and they began reliving parts of the past and how the two lovers fell in love.  I m now on chapter  two and am looking forward to finding out more as the band now gets back on the bus and heads to another location on their tour.



I have always wanted to be in a band and see the country, or world sometimes I forget just how hard it can be. Never staying in one place for long.  Not to mention leaving friends and family for long periods of time. While I like traveling and seeing new places, if I were to be gone that long, Id rather be with those closest to me while I do it and collect memories along the way…



 Till Next time….   

New Years Goals

     It is getting close to a new season and a new year. So, I thought since I haven’t been writing on here in a while, I would catch those who are still here up to what’s going on. I have had three foot surgeries - on the same foot. The first being the original to get rid of a painful bunion. The second and third were follow ups from the first. After the first surgery there was a plate and three screws placed. Which were to remain in the foot.  The plate after about a year or so, began to cause my foot to swell so they removed that.

The third was to straighten hammer toes…. Both painful and both requiring about 6 weeks of recovery and therapy. December 30^th, 2019 will be the final day of therapy for the last (I hope) surgery. Although I do like this surgeon, I would rather see him at the dry cleaner or gas station.



It was while I was recovering from this last 6 weeks I began thinking of next year. As well as the past years and what I have accomplished over my life. Groceries we needed to buy, how to rearrange… When you are on bed rest and unable to do anything for weeks on end all sorts of things run through your head. But the most frustrating part - not being able to walk and do anything.

Anyway….



One of the things I thought about were the books on my shelf that I have and have not read. Books I want to read, and books I’d like to reread. I not only have physical books lining my shelves (which are made from cardboard boxes and plastic shelves- I like to recycle) but I also have a kindle and nook with at least 20 books on each. That’s not counting the same book on both, so I can continue reading something I find really good.



So instead of naming them all, I will name the book I will be reading and give a book report of sorts on it. Unless there ae those of you who would rather not know specifics. Which in that case I’ll just give you generals…. ‘Well I sat down to read chapter 4, and so far, it’s good. I don’t like, so in so but I hope my views change.’



I am thinking of things that will keep me blogging again and connected to not only you but my soul as well.   



I am also working on editing my latest Nano story which is a series of short Christmas type inspirational stories.  Some have hints of romance. As I look back at all my stories they all have hints of romance in them… After all I am a hopeless romantic.



So for December I choose a book from the library book mobile entitled The perfect love song -a Christmas story by Patti Callahan Henry.



Each week I’ll post an update, so you know how things are going and how I’m doing with my goal to read all of my books before adding to my collections. If there are books I no longer want I will give them away or delete them from my kindle or nook.



This helps me try and organize my bookshelf and clean and organize my home and life.  It seems the more clutter the more chaos my life has. And after the last 3 almost 4 years, the less chaos the better.



So until next time……

Again have been away

 Over the past two years( this one included) there have been things in my life I have had to deal with and things I wasn't sure how to deal with so I withdrew. But starting in January I am coming back and writing again.  So this blog is going to be redone with a new look to go with the  new year/ new me.

I will be sharing a few things that are personal and some writings which I did that helped me or are helping me regain my footing. Hope to see you in the New Year.


Later.

Follow me if you dare

Good day all, we are on the eve of Nanowrimo and I am participating this year. I will be rewriting a story I began years ago and will be updaating my writing and progress over at quiet writer which can be found here http://debswritingcorner.blogspot.com/

I hope you all will  hope over there and hit follow as we go through this month writing and getting ready for thanksgiving.

I'm still here

Goodness it has been a while since I have been here.  Thank you all for  sticking with me here as I  wander to places unknown. Seeing my last  entry was back in January I realize so many things have happened.  A divorce, a death of a loved one and a new relationship started. Now I am and have been considering grouping all of my blogs in one spot. I was wanting to create one just for my story and book updates and other  writing pieces and one for the daily thoughts.

Then I thought about it, most of my thoughts even though they don't look like it are about writing that connects to the soul. So I have decided to stay here and then figure out how to add a page for my books so you can stay updated and buy when the new ones come out. 

Another thing I was looking into was creating a mailing list to send out updates and how to keep you all informed.  

My boyfriend is taking IT classes  so I am learning along with him.... Learning something new is a great thing, and I always say you should learn something new all the time. 

I miss talking to all of you daily and keeping updated with whats going on, so if you see me absent for a while, pray for me and anxiously look for my return, I will be back.

By the way next month is time for nano again. I have a story all ready to go. 


( thats one reason I wanted to get back to blogging) 

talk to you all soon 

New Year New start

 ( sorry about the high lighting- I have been trying to get rid of it.)

First I want to thank all of  you who continue to read my blogs, and continue reading even through the hard times and gaps of the entries.  And I hope you continue reading and hopefully learn from what I share or enjoy reading what I share. 

Now second on to today's post:

Don't we all love the new year and a fresh start? After all it is the perfect time to start over or find a new path to travel down especially if things have not gone well during a previous year. I am no exception. A New Year means new things and new adventures. It also means new challenges and obstacles we need to face and deal with. 

 This year is no exception.  I am going to be writing several things I have not only gone through but also the lessons I have learned. I have thought about writing a book regarding the past years events but after three or four drafts its not working. So I will be writing the events and lessons attached here instead,  not because they are that boring but because they are connected to my soul and I hope they will connect with your soul as well.

I am also working through a book called "The Language of Letting go" by Melody Beattie (and would like to get her other two books in the future). Because having been a wife I was a Mrs and all that went with being a wife. So I became a little - well a lot -- codependent. Now I am working to live on my own and learn who I am and what or who I can become as a single woman. 

So I hope what I have learned and am learning will help you as well.  

Stay tuned for more.

Nano time

For those who dont know what nano is, its National Novel Writing Month, and I have undertaken that challenge. It is a fiction story based on nonfiction experiences. In the past I was always able to find answers to things happening in my life, and I'm hoping this  will help me find the next direction in my journey.

I always discover new things when I write a story, so we will see what new things I learn after I finish this story. Again sorry I have been absent.

Anxiety

Anxiety

1 Peter 5:7 “ Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.”

Now part two, of this journey.  Today we talk about anxiety. Each day while I was waiting for a place of my own, I heard nothing. No phone calls no letters nothing.  Soon days went to weeks and weeks into months. Finally after a misunderstanding regarding my name I got a place- a month before the month I was to have surgery and would be off my feet.

But those months anxiety filled me so bad nothing else seemed to matter. Each day I worried things wouldn’t happen in time and I would either have to cancel the doctor visit and surgery or still be at the ex’s as I recover. Neither one of us wanted that.  But Jesus tells us in 1 Peter 5:7 “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.”

Sometimes those words are easier than actually doing them, especially when for the most part you will be alone. Once I was living on my own that’s where I would be, alone for the most part. So maybe I was not ready for that. There were so many things happening in my life at that time. I didn’t know what to do or where to turn. All the more reason to turn to God and ask for his protection and guidance. All the more reason to rely on what He says I should do – which is in His Word. And I’m working on that slowly.  But it will take time and moving forward. Step by step day by day.

Let’s pray: Father we may not understand what is happening in our lives and where we are to go. In those moments forgive us for not turning to you when we should. Thank you for being there for us and being there for us and gently guiding us to where we need to go.  Thank you for all you do,

in Jesus name Amen.

Patience Pt 1

                                                     

                                                      Psalms 46:10 (NIV)

                                         

                                             “Be still and know that I am God”

Because my life and the events of it which changed the direction of it started back in January, that’s when I can say the fork in the road appeared. And to this day it is still very hard to talk about. But talking about it does seem to help. That’s because I am not focusing on it and thinking about it constantly. But that does not mean I don’t have guilt seeping in at odd moments.

More on guilt later, now we are going to focus on Patience and how hard it is to be patient. Back in January my husband and I divorced and I moved into my own place. Because I have never had the chance to live alone needless to say I was… well a bunch of emotions I did not know how to process. I am glad my now ex and I parted on friendly grounds but that didn’t help what would happen farther down the road.

Also in January I had made the decision to have foot surgery to have a bunion removed. It had begun to hurt more than I could handle, however had I known the events that would soon unfold I wonder if I would have had the surgery. After talking with the assistant for the doctor who would be doing the surgery, my surgery was scheduled for June of 2015.

But that surgery set the stage for the changes – and growth – that I am now going through. That’s not to say there aren’t growing pains because letting to and letting God can be hard to do. But that is what we need to do and wouldn’t it be better to be prepared instead of blindsided?  Because regardless how hard we try to stop change from happening it, it will happen. Our best option, Trust in Jesus who knows us and what we are really capable of, even more than we do.  So how here it is Jan, I am divorced, have to find my own place, get moved in and set up house before June.

 In part two I will continue with the unfolding journey as it leads to present day.

Let’s pray: Father thank you for another day and another day closer to who I am to be. Change is hard to do sometimes and hard to accept. But we know change is something that happens and to help with that we need to trust you because according to your words you have our best interests at heart. Thank you for knowing more about us than we do, help us to daily put our trust in you and believe what is happening in our lives is in our best interest even when its hard for us to understand.  In Jesus name Amen.

(Sorry this was late today,  will be working on pt 2 this weekend and have it Monday.)